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Breaking up rules When it's over what's next?

#1 User is offline   hurinami 

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Post icon  Posted 15 January 2004 - 06:05 AM

Are there rules for when it ends? Like burn every picture or letter? Get with anyone possible to show you never cared? Or do you find a way to ruin their life out of pure anger? What does everyone else do?
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#2 User is offline   Cold Kisma 

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Posted 15 January 2004 - 06:11 AM

hmm, I don't really know what to do in this situation either. I have only gone through one actual break-up and he just left for college, so I didn't have to deal with it. I still love him though- I would never burn his picture.
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#3 User is offline   hurinami 

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Posted 15 January 2004 - 06:16 AM

It's not easy to let go of course...hehe I still have a box of everything. But It would be better if I put somewhere I wouldn't find it so easily, so I don't have to feel so bitter all the time I look inside. But then again most of my ex-boyfriends want me to die I have no clue what I did, so I probaly would still feel the bitterness no matter what.
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#4 User is offline   Pinkerton 

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Posted 15 January 2004 - 06:20 AM

i say get rid of everything, that is the only way to get that person out of your life. that is if you want them out of your life.
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#5 User is offline   messie_jessie 

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Posted 15 January 2004 - 06:27 AM

Rules? There aren't rules for everything! Breaking up and the rest is just a thing you use your instinct for. Do what you feel is best.

Although, I wouldn't throw everything out. You may be real angry and hurt now, but whether or not the relationship was great while it lasted, you may (later on) want to reflect on the experiences and lessons you gained from it- and having things from the relationship will help. But if you're finding it really hard, then put it out of view or give it to someone you trust to keep it for you until your ready to face it again.

Like I always say, listen to your heart but keep what your head is telling you into consideration too. :)

This post has been edited by messie_jessie: 15 January 2004 - 06:28 AM

Cause he lives inside
of fairy tales and castles now
and there's room inside
for false expectations and illusions
Lifehouse, Fairy Tales and Castles



As they took his soul they stole his pride
And as he faced the sun he cast no shadow
Oasis, Cast no shadow
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#6 User is offline   Pinkerton 

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Posted 15 January 2004 - 06:29 AM

messie_jessie, on Jan 14 2004, 11:27 PM, said:

Rules? There aren't rules for everything! Breaking up and the rest is just a thing you use your instinct for. Do what you feel is best. 

Although, I wouldn't throw everything out. You may be real angry and hurt now, but whether or not  the relationship was great while it lasted, you may want to reflect on the experiences and lessons you gained from it- and having things from the relationship will help. But if you're finding it really hard, then put it out of view or give it to someone you trust to keep it for you until your ready to face it again.

Like I always say, listen to your heart but keep what your head is telling you into consideration too.  :)

that is true but the things you learn will most likely be in your mind instead of a picture. im not the sentimental type to keep things from past relationships. like that saying "out with the old, in with the new."

This post has been edited by The Bolang: 15 January 2004 - 06:39 AM

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#7 User is offline   hurinami 

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Posted 15 January 2004 - 06:38 AM

The Bolang, on Jan 15 2004, 07:29 AM, said:

that is true but the things you learn will most likely be in your mind instead of a picture. im not the sentimental type to keep things from past relationships. like that saying "old with the old, in with the new."

Yeah but a picture says 1000 words or something like that
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#8 User is offline   Pinkerton 

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Posted 15 January 2004 - 06:40 AM

when you break up with someone and you look at thier picture, how many of those 1000 words good? even after a couple of months with that picture. cant always hang on to the past.
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#9 User is offline   WshIWsChrono 

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Posted 15 January 2004 - 06:41 AM

I never throw stuff out. I just throw it all in the same drawer that holds the stuff from the last time i put stuff in it. so after a while, u just have this drawer full off stuff. but i'm kinda a pack rat, so maybe it's just me :P
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#10 User is offline   Cold Kisma 

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Posted 15 January 2004 - 06:43 AM

I keep so much stuff, I have a scrapbook, and I save all my movie tickets and I can name the people with me for almost all tickets (because Pirates of the carribean was like 30 people) and I love to take pictures.

I think they are improtant. I don't know but thoughts are intangible and can be lost or stored away, when you see something that jogs you're memory you just get this rush of emotion and I love that. Im a pack-rat too, I got it from my mom.

This post has been edited by Cold Kisma: 15 January 2004 - 06:48 AM

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PINKERTON is my favorite color
Xin, VV good luck on your adventures
<3 for life: JJ, Rin, Hentai, Sku, SM, Corv, Doom, Jack, Bolang.

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#11 User is offline   messie_jessie 

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Posted 15 January 2004 - 06:44 AM

Bolang- yep! good point. But i'm forgetful and i'm extremely sentimental! heehee! :P

Hurinami- too true! Even just an expression or something can say so much more than any memory!

Breaking up is a hard-all-rounder. Not that i'd know!! :P (only 15 :( ) but I think any sort of relationship break-up is difficult to get over! Things will stick with you whether you throw everything out or not.
Cause he lives inside
of fairy tales and castles now
and there's room inside
for false expectations and illusions
Lifehouse, Fairy Tales and Castles



As they took his soul they stole his pride
And as he faced the sun he cast no shadow
Oasis, Cast no shadow
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#12 User is offline   eSt 

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Posted 15 January 2004 - 10:25 AM

that is so true mj. My recent girl, we didn't go out long but i still felt somethin when we broke up.
"I'm just a notch in your bed post, but your just a line in a song." - Fallout Boy
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#13 User is offline   Ido_Alpha_Omega 

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Posted 15 January 2004 - 10:30 AM

forgive each other for whatever hateful things you may have said or thought... unfortunately as humans we wander this world hurting each other... if you can't learn to forgive and move on, you will be in and endless spiral of hatred and destruction
Et il est un jour arrivé
Marteler le ciel
Et marteler la mer

Et la mer avait embrassé moi
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#14 User is offline   Lord Kakamo 

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Posted 15 January 2004 - 10:35 AM

Put everything in a box and lock it away somewhere, a place where you dont have to look at it, but can still look at it if you need to. Keeping letters and pictures is important to me, my memory is sketchy at best, so it's good to have these things.
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#15 User is offline   Pinkerton 

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Posted 16 January 2004 - 12:58 AM

Ido_Alpha_Omega, on Jan 15 2004, 03:30 AM, said:

forgive each other for whatever hateful things you may have said or thought... unfortunately as humans we wander this world hurting each other... if you can't learn to forgive and move on, you will be in and endless spiral of hatred and destruction

so easily said, so hard to practice. some people live off of that grudge, its keeps them going.
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